When the twins were born, the three of us cried…
It was a big deal for me hearing my babies cry. It made me join the choir. We all cried out LOUD.
The process of creating and growing life inside the body is deeply mysterious, miraculous and mind-blowing. Pregnancy, especially twin pregnancy can be full of unknowns. You have absolutely no control regarding what is going on inside the utero. Sometimes things go wrong, and sometimes it goes absolutely well. No one can tell. It’s a journey of faith and trust. You trust every day that you will make it to the finish line.
You get tested along the way…
- You question whether your body is doing what it’s supposed to do.
- You wonder if you are doing enough – rest, food, taking care of yourself, etc.
- You worry (in my case with two in there) whether they are forming well, whether their organs will be fully formed and functional. No one wishes for a deformed baby or abnormalities, but they happen.
- You prepare your heart for the best, and also for the worst. You are only a thought away from being consumed by anxiety.
- You work hard to maintain a positive mindset, guarding the gates of the mind against the torment of “what if…” yet almost simultaneously, you are filled with joyful expectation, of what life would look like when your babies arrive.
Also, It’s not possible to know what the babies really look like, yet they are intricately part of you.
You walk around with them, sleep with them till the moment when the cord is cut.
When my first baby came out with a loud cry, I didn’t just shed tears of joy, I let out my own big cry as well.
I cried aloud.
My cry said:
- We are over the finish line.
- They are safe.
- They are loved beyond words.
When new life bursts into a room, It changes everything. I am no longer pregnant, I am a mom – again. Almost immediately my body confirms this as it delivers the placenta.
It is done.
What a mystery.
Then there’s the calm and quiet when all three of us are no longer crying but cuddling. No words can describe the moment the two babies were put on my chest . Their eyes unopened, but they could sense their mama. Though it was our first real contact, we already know each other so intimately. Their faces were new to me, but I knew my babies deeply.
We came through to the other side together safely – all three of us.
My cry was one of relief.
If joy was a river, my banks are overflowing.
PS:
I didn’t realize it’s exactly 40 days today since the twins were born until I wrote this post. I wrote it spontaneously on my phone in the dark hours of the morning… an attempt to frame so many things that have unfolded in the past couple of weeks. This is my first of many posts that I hope to write. I am working my way backwards to the beginning…hopefully….
Can any mama out there relate?
Written by Grace Samson-Song
Grace has been curious about transitions from a very young age. She currently consults and assists people to get unstuck in the areas of life purpose and calling, career choices and personal development. She is the founder of The Maximize group and the Author of Crossing Intersections.
