Each time I think about writing about some of my wilderness experiences, I easily feel overwhelmed by the possible length of the piece. I imagine a book – too many details, emotions, people and places to capture.
This is a mere attempt to metaphorically condense my thoughts, in the hope that the words will resonate and encourage someone.
Wilderness is a time of emptying, letting go and surrendering to a higher guidance – God’s will.
It is a place where old identities are shed, mindsets changed, and crowns are fashioned through fiery trials and tests.
Lesson 1- Surrender.
The wilderness is a vulnerable place of surrender. As you surrender, your hands are raised towards heaven. You release your grip on your old identity. As your identity dissolves, some relationships become washed away by the changing tides. You grieve the endings because you are making room for new beginnings.
You will recognize the vastness of wilderness when your mind suddenly feels limited. When you are unable to come up with answers or the plan.
You may find yourself in the dark, where you are utterly reliant on the pillar of cloud by day, and a pillar of fire by night.
When you have to constantly look up.
When you are challenged to stay open and ready, because you cannot settle into the comfort of a predictable routine or schedule.
When you have no idea when the instructions will change – are you going left or right tomorrow?
Lesson 2 – Seeking.
The wilderness may come as a Deep Longing. You are no longer satisfied with the present pleasures. Your soul pants for the new like the deer seeking water. You say your prayers, pleading and begging to be released, because you are feeling trapped. You cultivate a prophetic ability to see into your desired Promised Land long before your feet physically arrive there. You call it forth through persistent prayers. Your dreams at night become full of vivid imagery.
You eventually start to move in that direction. You travel with a heightened awareness that anyone you meet along the way may have some clue to help you frame the future. You are open to entertaining strangers like Abraham did.
You long for what you are afraid of.
You no longer worry about “how safe” the road is, because the desire for your destiny is greater.
Lesson 3 – Solitude.
Solitude is defined as the state or situation of being “alone”. You may feel “lonely’ too. It’s the season where many may not really understand you – and honestly, you barely understand the process yourself.
You will notice that very few will reach out to you, not because they are malicious, but because it’s unsettling and uncomfortable to bring up the conversation about your process. You will encounter you own fair share of “Job’s friends” who are staunchly convinced that their “sheltered” life qualifies them to become your advisers. You may be perceived as a “cautionary tale” because some sin in your life is the reason why you are “deserted”.
Lesson 4 – Scary.
The wilderness is a great and terrifying place. I love this phrase – I got it straight from the Bible. You will encounter snakes and scorpions. You will fight with the sting of death, and the depth of despair. You will stagger through the fog of deception. The Truth you know has to be viscously guarded in the chambers of your heart. The winds will blow relentlessly. The storms will overwhelm you. The sun will scorch your skin. Your vision will almost become dim, except for the light in your soul, that is your divine strength.
It is a place of intense temptation from the ancient serpent and open invitation for intimacy from the Father. As terrifying as it may be, you will also know that God is your “ever-present help.”
Lesson 5 – Shaking.
The wilderness is also a place intensity and subtlety. You will be shaken to your very core. You will be intensely tested in your faith. The winds will attempt to blow you off your foundational beliefs. This can be so obvious. The not so obvious but most dangerous is the temptation. Along the way, you will be tempted to cut corners. There will be easier or cheaper alternatives. Your yearning and longing will be so great that you will most likely consider counter-offers and the seductive options on the table.
Moses stuck the rock twice instead of once, because he furiously wanted to “solve the issue at hand”. The wilderness will bring you to the edge of yourself. Jesus knew that so well, when he fought the three temptations in his 40-day fast and journey in the wilderness.
Lesson 6 – Supernatural.
The wilderness is also fraught with supernatural experiences. You are crowned with coincidences that are nothing but miracles. You confront the Pharaoh of your life. Your courage rises like a tower, reaching into the heavens. You become a staunch believer in the impossible. You move mountains. You bend gates of steel until they melt open. You find partnership with angels who are sent ahead of you to fight the impossible battles that cannot be explained. You shed your fears, like old garments.
Then there’s the manna experience that is a distinctive of the wilderness. The provision and nourishment that is exclusively divine.
Ultimately, the wilderness is necessary to strengthen one’s soul.
You realize that God is FOR you, not against you. You accept that this is not a faith-crisis, it is the experience of Faith itself.
If you are willing to accept it,
The purpose of your wilderness is to fashion your crown.
The version of crowning that I am talking about here is what the dictionary defines as “Crowning as a triumphant culmination of (an effort or endeavor, especially a prolonged one).”
Your crown will be made from the material of your pain and triumph. Your crown will be the authority that will come upon you when you enter the Promised Land.
The Israelites took the wilderness journey for 40 years. Jesus took on the wilderness in the form of a 40-day fast. You will be required to go through your wilderness on the road to fulfilling your destiny on earth. It will be a “symbolic 40” for you in some form.
For those of you that have heard me say this prophetic phrase: “The Old is Crumbling, the New is Crowning.” Crowning is the word that comes to mind for me as I hit the milestone age of 40.
I am reflecting on a portion of my wilderness journey…
Ironically, the only way to the Promised Land is through the Wilderness.
I am sensing the New, and the disappearing of the Old. I am crowning. I am grateful for the Wilderness.
How about you?
